Personal Life Issues

Lisa Questions Her Traits And Addiction

Dr. Dale Archer — Thu, 23 May 2013 06:00:00 GMT

Lisa grew up in a dysfunctional home where mom and dad hated each other, and they only shared one meal each year, where mom would just about throw the turkey at dad. She has an adventurous spirt, hence her job as an international flight attendant. She wonders if she's an alcoholic, wonders why she's a multitasker, why she prefers younger men and why her life is so disorganized. She wonders if she needs to return to AA, return to basics or just slow her life down. Thoughts?

Naved Has Lost His Confidence

Dr. Dale Archer — Sun, 12 May 2013 06:00:00 GMT

Naved used to fight boys bigger and stronger than him and never lost a fight. Then he fought a boy weaker than him, and lost. He lost all of his confidence, and years later he still cannot find his confidence. Although this helped curb his aggression, he'd like to be confident again, so asks what he can do. Thoughts?

Jane Is Suspicious Of Others

Dr. Dale Archer — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 06:00:00 GMT

Jane's past is riddled with pain, sorrow and backstabbing. Still, she considers herself positive, friendly and loyal -- on the surface.

Bob Is Alienating His Friends And Doesn't Know Why

Dr. Dale Archer — Fri, 05 Apr 2013 06:00:00 GMT

Bob is a 79 year old man in good health. Suddenly, he is being asked to resign from many of his social groups that he has belonged to, some for years! Without giving particulars, he asks what could be wrong, what's he doing to alienate all these people. Many people have what I call a blind spot, where they don't see themselves for who they really are. How can he correct this?

Should Rony Tell The University About His Friend Cheating?

Dr. Dale Archer — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 06:00:00 GMT

Rony is at a university and got very close to another student. This student, however, partied all the time, and wanted to cheat off Rony and others.

Michelle Needs To Fall In Love

Dr. Dale Archer — Sun, 17 Mar 2013 06:00:00 GMT

Michelle is a 34 year old plus-sized woman who has a strong faith in God but is lonely. She never dated in high school or college, but didn't worry about it because she was too busy. Now she'd wants deperately to fall in love and have a family.

Angie Is Consumed By Her Life

Dr. Dale Archer — Sun, 03 Feb 2013 06:00:00 GMT

Angie is retired, and lived a life of neglect and abuse from her mother, but love from her father. They're both deceased now, but to this day she still nurses that anger toward mom. She's in ill health with no insurance, and her antidepressants aren't helping.

Al Wants To Know The Key To Finding Happiness

Dr. Dale Archer — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 06:00:00 GMT

Al struggles with happiness. He's a successful orthodontist, has a lovely family, lives in a beautiful home, tries different hobbies whenever he pleases..... yet happiness eludes him.

John Has Lost It All And Doesn't Know How To Go On

Dr. Dale Archer — Sat, 19 Jan 2013 06:00:00 GMT

John overcame incredible odds, and was on his own at 12. Ultimately, he owned his own company and had 40 employees. Then the economy crashed and at 61, he finds himself in a precarious situation. He lost his business and is fighting to keep his home.

Jan Gives An Important Lesson Regarding Forgiveness

Dr. Dale Archer — Tue, 11 Dec 2012 06:00:00 GMT

Jan wrote to me a year ago regarding unresolved trust issues due to a childhood incident. During the past year, she has learned a priceless lesson on the value and importance of forgiveness -- not for the perpetrator, but for herself.

Sarah Feels Too Guilty Whenever She Says "No"

Dr. Dale Archer — Tue, 16 Oct 2012 14:00:00 GMT

Sarah feels she needs a therapist, but can't afford one. She cannot say "no" because she feels overwhelming guilt, and doesn't want the other person to feel badly. She's full of apologies, yet still cannot say no without feeling the guilt.

How Does Nicole Tell Her Live In Guy It's Time To Leave?

Dr. Dale Archer — Mon, 15 Oct 2012 14:00:00 GMT

Nicole has had her friend live with her for the past three years so she'd feel safe. She's now ready to live alone, but doesn't want to hurt her friend's feelings. She wonders where will he go, since he has nothing but his clothes and a television.

Scott Fantasizes About His Mother

Dr. Dale Archer — Fri, 05 Oct 2012 14:00:00 GMT

Scott is 25 and is consumed about sexual fantasies involving his mother. It has gotten to the point that he must fantasize about her in order to have sex with other women. He wonders if he's abnormal or mentally unstable and how he can control this.

Des Hates Her Small Breasts

Dr. Dale Archer — Thu, 04 Oct 2012 02:00:00 GMT

Des is 26, 5' 9" and much taller than her mom and sisters. Her small breasts do not fit her frame, and she finds it a challenge to find bras that fit her correctly. It has caused a self-esteem problem, especially since a childhood illness caused her to be big boned and delay puberty until age 17. She asks what can she do to accept herself the way she is?

Daisy Asks Why Did God Allow Her To Survive An Attempted Abortion

Dr. Dale Archer — Wed, 03 Oct 2012 06:00:00 GMT

Daisy is 22 and a third child. The first two were wanted, while she was a surprise. Her parents attempted to abort her, but she survived. She asks why God would allow this to happen, if children are gifts from God. I attempt to answer a very difficult question.

Ajay Says No One Likes Him And Wonders Why

Dr. Dale Archer — Tue, 02 Oct 2012 06:00:01 GMT

Ajay is a 43 year old businessman who has a 36 year old housewife and two teenage children. He has a hard time dealing with others, though he tries to be a good person. He helps the poor, homeless animals and those weaker than he. And yet, despite all this, no one likes him. They're either jealous or want to compete with him, and he's not sure what's going on.

Patricia Tries To Be Like The Popular Girls

Dr. Dale Archer — Fri, 21 Sep 2012 06:00:00 GMT

Patricia wants to be like the popular girls. She imitates the way they talk, dress, fix their hair, and yet feels people still don't like her. She is married, but is not sure if she's really happy. Life is passing her by, and asks how she can make friends and ultimately, be happy....and popular.

Safae Feels Her Life Is Over At 19

Dr. Dale Archer — Thu, 13 Sep 2012 14:00:00 GMT

Safae is 19 and miserable. She's not as pretty as her sister or her cousin, and has never been on a trip. She spends her days in her room with her laptop, seeking others. She had an online relationship, but all the guy wanted to do was make love over the Internet. She asks for our advice.

Ann Is Breaking Under The Stress Of Med School

Dr. Dale Archer — Sat, 08 Sep 2012 06:00:00 GMT

Ann is in her fourth year of medical school. She is stressed out, angry, hates the friends she has and is sure people don't want her to succeed. Nothing concerns her except med school and studying. She hates her sister, who is 22 and also in med school. She states her sister is always putting her down, but that since she has a "disease" everyone takes her side. She's angry at everything, but mostly that all she does is study and work and she wonders if this will be forever.

Kesay Wants To Be In Control Of His Life

Dr. Dale Archer — Thu, 06 Sep 2012 06:00:00 GMT

Kesay is 32 and has plenty of ideas going through his head -- he just can't concentrate enough to make them happen. His English isn't as good as he'd like, and he has trouble getting his ideas across to his co-workers and superiors. He knows if he could learn better English his whole life -- personal and professional -- would be better, but when he gets home from work, he is too tired to study.

Lisha Doesn't Trust Herself To Find A Healthy Relationship

Dr. Dale Archer — Sun, 02 Sep 2012 14:00:00 GMT

Lisha is 46 and a mother of three. Successful yet confused, she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and had moments of intense energy and racing thoughts followed by bouts of depression. She's been in unhealthy relationships and now questions her judgment of the men she chooses. What do you think -- is there a way to make better life decisions when one has a mood disorder? Can medication allow a person to think more clearly or does it make that part worse?Everything else is good, she just wants better boyfriends.

Cathy Can't Get Over The Death Of Her Husband

Dr. Dale Archer — Sun, 19 Aug 2012 06:00:00 GMT

Cathy's 47 year old husband died shortly after their horrific car accident. It's been a year and a half, but she is still feeling the survivor's guilt. When she does manage to have a fun day, she feels guilty that he's not there to share it with her. She is seeing a psychiatrist and social worker, but doesn't feel like she's making any progress. Do you have thoughts to share with her?

Madeleine's Mother Disapproves Of Her Boyfriend

Dr. Dale Archer — Fri, 17 Aug 2012 14:00:00 GMT

Madeleine is 26 years old and is dating for the first time. She has always lived with her parents and grandparents and has always been obedient. Her mother disapproves of her boyfriend. Says he's ugly, lazy and cannot provide for her. Her mother, while caring for her father after his stroke, has emotionally blackmailed her, saying if she moves out it will kill her grandpa. She wants to move out, but neither she nor her boyfriend work, as he is supported by his own mother. How does your solution compare to mine?

Lanay's Doctors Cannot Control Her Pain

Dr. Dale Archer — Mon, 13 Aug 2012 06:00:00 GMT

Lanay has been suffering from back pain for 20 years. She doesn't have health insurance, and the county medical doctors are not helping her find relief. Looking online, she discovered she needs injections, but her doctor says there's no such procedure. She asks me what she should do and where to turn. I give her my thoughts. Do you have something to add?

Meem Wants To Be An Engineer; His Parents Say Doctor

Dr. Dale Archer — Sat, 11 Aug 2012 06:00:00 GMT

Meem is a 19 year old man who has always dreamed of becoming an engineer. However, on his boards he didn't quite make the grade for engineering school at his university, so he has to wait a year before retesting. His parents, however, insist he give up this "stupid" idea of becoming an engineer and enroll in pre-med to become a doctor. He asks if he should do as his parents say or follow his dream?