Success Stories
Tammy Gives Us An Update After The Death Of Her Son
12/19/2011 2:00:45 PM
Dear Dr. Archer,
I am writing to you today with much relief and in a much better place than I was a couple of months ago! We are now trying to find somewhere to go for marriage counseling.

I have been going to church alone, but now my husband wants to go with me. We have had many hours and nights of just talking to each other, and our focus is now back on each other. I love my husband with everything I am, and have spent over half of my life with him. I couldn't ever imagine losing him.

You were right to keep my hope and faith, and that it all would work out the way it is supposed to! Thank you so much, because you gave me the strength to open up to my husband and do what had to be done. 

It was very painful and healing at the same time! My marriage is headed in the right direction now, and I am so very happy and thankful for that! We have been through the worst, and by that I mean losing my son, so I know we can also get through this!

In case you don't remember me, I am the one that my teen son was killed in a car accident, and my husband had been having an affair with the passenger in the car. God bless you and all the families you help.
Tammy

Dear Tammy,
I get so many letters, but there are a handful that remain with me. Yours, "Tammy's Son Died In A Car Crash", is one of those few I will never forget. Thank you so much for giving me an update.

 I am thrilled that you and your husband are working through your issues, with all the love you describe, I’m convinced you will make it. You have each other and your two precious children, and together you can all enjoy a loving, happy life.

Again, thank you for the update. Receiving feedback and knowing that I helped someone in need is priceless. I do ask one favor. Please stay in touch on my website and whenever you see another person going through a similar problem as you did, please weigh in. You have the ability to help others and that will indeed also keep help you as well.

I wish you peace and happiness.
Dr. Archer

Posted by: Dr. Dale Archer | Submit comment | Tell a friend

Categories: parenting  |  relationships

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8 Comments
12/19/2011 4:34:12 PM
I am so glad that the light of hope has shone, and I knew it would! Keep it always there in your heart. It is through hardship that God has a chance to help us and show us his compassion and mercy. The way you are picking up yourself and re-gaining the love with your husband is also God's blessing. The time is near for you to be happy again. As you said, you went through the worst, and you are alive, facing reality. Remember Job and how he was patient, while he was gradually losing everything... But God was trying him out and then rewarded him. Since we know that death has been beaten, and we are reminded of this every Easter with the resurrection. Which will happen as well for each one of us!
12/19/2011 9:29:21 PM
You have somehow found strength in the face of tragedy and taken steps to keep your life moving forward and minimize loss. Your courage is inspiring.
DDA
12/21/2011 7:00:10 AM
She most certainly has been through a time that would try any of us, Marcia. The god news is that it sounds like they both want the marriage to survive and in almost every case I’ve been involved with, when both spouses want to make it work, it will.
DDA
12/21/2011 7:01:01 AM
Isn't it, Lola? We can all learn from Tammy.
12/23/2011 2:41:45 PM
Thank you all so much! I have a peace in me that I have not had since we layed Jay to rest! I have done so much inner searching and praying that I believe My God is at work in me! I'll never understand this road I travel but then everything in life is not to understand! I just know that I want to Travel this winding sometimes steep road with the man I vowed to when I was just 17 yrs old! God bless you all for everything I truly believe if it had not been for the courage you all gave me I would be headed for divorce!
12/30/2011 8:57:41 PM
I'm so glad that ache in your chest is lessening little by little and the anger subsiding. It fills you up until it seems there's nothing left, doesn't it? But you're coming out the other end, and my fondest wish for you is that you can feel joy going forward once again.
1/3/2012 6:50:51 AM
No way, a divorce has no place Tammy! This is a short life, so no point to lose it in such a way. Enjoy it with what you have. And we'll have the whole picture once we get to the other end. But you have been tortured so much already, you deserve some happiness now. All the best, happy new year...
DDA
1/5/2012 12:26:32 AM
Tammy, you made my day. I want nothing but happiness and peace for you and your husband as you continue your journey through Life. Make the most of it and stay in touch.
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